In Carl's Professional Ethics class, they've been discussing some pretty heady topics lately, some of which he shares with me as we settle into bed at night. Yesterday, it was the question of happiness, and whether it's something that can be, well, chosen. We talked about this for a while, and Carl, who has spent weeks thinking about this sort of thing, summed it up pretty perfectly (I think).
Happiness isn't a choice. You can't (or maybe he, or we can't) just say, "okay, I'm going to be happy right now," and be it. Rather, happiness is a product of a series of choices you make...some right, some wrong, some easier than others, some small, some really big, some painful, some probably made with little thought or feeling.
***Last night was the first time it has felt like Fall all season. It was chilly out, and the three of us fell asleep during the first scene of an early movie. Carl in his thick blue robe, me in my red flannel pajamas, and Lily as a pumpkin. Tonight, we sat around our dinner table and read for class over wine and pizza.
I'm not perfect. Our lives aren't perfect. I've made plenty of good and bad choices in my life, but I wouldn't choose a do-over for any of them. Joined together, they have led me here, to this moment, to this life, and right now, I am happy. I am full. And I am grateful.
Happy weekend, friends. Wishing you the best, from the bottom of my heart.